Nebraska Adventures Part 1: Mother's Day

We were able to be a part of many wonderful events in Nebraska - my twin cousins' graduation and both my brother's and my mother's birthdays.  But I didn't get any pictures of those.  Not a single one.  FAIL.  So I will attempt to chronicle the events I DID get pictures of...the first being Mother's Day.

Have I mentioned I'm not a fan?  I think it all started during the years of really wanting (and trying) to be a mother.  In fact, one year it was the Monday after Mother's Day that I was scheduled to do the blood test to find out if the latest IVF was successful.  I spent the whole day wondering, "Am I?" only to be very disappointed the next day.  Ultimately, it set me up for too many expectations of how wonderful Mother's Day would be.  My first Mother's Day the twins slept less, the night before, than they have any other night in their lives thus far...and then pooped on me.  My second Mother's Day they both got a stomach bug and I spent the entire day cleaning up vomit and doing laundry.  My third Mother's Day I cancelled.  Did I mention that, because Mother's Day is on a Sunday, it is never the day of pampering I was promised (even without sleep deprivation, poo, and vomit)?  See, Sunday for a Pastor's wife is the busiest day of the week.  He leaves earlier in the morning than any other day (no sleeping in or breakfast in bed), you are solely responsible for getting yourself and your children dressed and out the door for church (extra pressure on Mother's Day when you feel pressured to look the perfect Mother/children), keeping everyone quiet during the service (no nursery on Mother's Day because all the workers want to enjoy church with their mothers), and getting everyone back home for lunch and down for naps (after which, once the house is silent and calm once again, your husband comes home).  And when I realized that, even if the streak of extreme Mother's Days didn't continue, I would eventually feel bitter that I didn't get the pampering I was promised because of the church (something I certainly did NOT want to feel), I cancelled it.  I don't feel bitter on any other Sunday of the year, so I told Lucas that, as far as I was concerned, it wasn't Mother's Day.  We would take a family trip to the zoo later in the week (and we did, and it was wonderful!).  

My husband is amazing, and does things all the time to let me know how much he appreciates me.  Every day my children give me hugs and kisses and tokens of affection (flowers picked from outside for example) and tell me I'm the best mommy, and they love me, and I'm their best friend, and so on.  I enjoy those so much more than this one day every year set aside with so much pressure.

This year, though, I got to be with my mom.  Perfection.

My mom is amazing.  Outwardly she is short and silly and soft-hearted.  She loves chocolate and chick-flicks and more chocolate.  But she loves being a mom more than anything, and it shows.  I think she did an amazing job with my brothers and I.  Even though, when I was younger,  I said a million times that I would never parent my children the way she parented me (you know, not letting me have my own phone and phone number, or making me call when I got somewhere, or making me do chores - the really terrible things when you are young), I want to be just like her now.  And I want my children to turn out just as well.  Seriously, my bothers and I are amazing people.  Humble too.  The point is, now that I'm a mom, I have total respect for my mom and all of the things she did for us as kids.  I see now how much of the person I am today is from how much of an amazing mom I had...and have.  Getting to spend the day with her was wonderful.

Too bad I didn't get a picture of it...

Road Trip

When the twins were tiny babies I followed a twin blog where the mom chronicled the many daily adventures she went on with her twins (2 1/2 at the time) - educational, exploring their community, and all over the country.  I remember that she blogged about her long road trip (2 month, I believe) with her 2 1/2 year old twins.  Her husband (who worked) would meet up with them whenever he could, but for the most part she and the kiddos went on a grand adventure, through several states, seeing everything they could see.  It sounded a little crazy, but it also sounded like a lot of fun...

So it didn't sound crazy to me to take a road trip from Michigan to Nebraska (on the way to Texas) with the twins...alone.  It was doable.  It would be an adventure!  Granted, there are 2 things that I have going for me that I would suggest might make this less intimidating to me: 1) I LIKE road trips.  I really enjoy them.  Not everyone does.  2) We have taken a LOT of long road trips with the twins.  Like this, or this, and this, or this, or...well...you get the picture.  Long drives are nothing new, and the kids - unless sick - travel really well.  Even then, the night before I started to get really nervous.

I shouldn't have.  It went great!  We stopped in Iowa, so the first day was about 7 hours of driving time (it took us about 9 hours to get there) and the second day was about 6 hours of driving time (it took us almost 9 again).  I did have a few tricks up my sleeve.  The first was our "Road Trip Rules," which I told the twins was a must for every road trip.  The rules?  1) We all go to the bathroom every time we stop.  No exceptions.  2) Mommy can't reach things while driving so hold onto your stuff!  If you drop it, no freak outs.  We will get it at our next stop.  3) We don't do things that bother other people in the van.  If they don't like it, it stops, no questions, no exceptions.  Quite frankly, simply saying "Road Trip Rules!" stopped a lot of potential freak outs.  The second was a giant bag full of smaller bags - each packed with a snack, a special treat, and entertaining items for the road (books, toys, crayons and paper, etc.)  At each stop I gave them a new bag...and since we stopped a lot this meant a lot of fresh entertainment.  In fact, did I mention they didn't watch a single movie?  I brought along the laptop and their dvd's, but since I couldn't monitor it unless the van was stopped I was hesitant to even put any on.  Thankfully, I didn't have to!
With some of their special surprises:

The first day was a breeze!  It was delightful.  There wasn't a single tantrum or freak out.  The twins were so excited about everything.  It was wonderful.  We were lucky that every time someone needed a potty break we had an amazing stop right there (like a rest area with a playground)!  We also made a point to stop at state welcome centers.  Partly because I've discovered the bathrooms tend to be cleaner, partly because they have all kinds of brochures and I knew the twins would enjoy picking some up.  On this trip we discovered that many of these welcome centers have coloring books they will give to little kids!  The twins have been enjoying coloring in their Iowa and Nebraska books :)
Our Iowa coloring books!

We stayed the night in Iowa, which was wonderful.  I love sneaking in visits (no matter how short) with people I don't get to see often.  The twins got to play with my aunt and uncle, and my cousin's kids, while I got to enjoy catching up with people I love.  So wonderful.
Playing with Aunt Jan

The second day was a little more rough.  Partly because - due to the different time zone - they were a little short on sleep (Allie told me she was "So, so tired.").  Partly because we left Bumble (remember him?  Ryan's favorite stuffed animal/best friend/bedtime necessity), and didn't realize until we were already an hour down the road...  So there was a good hour of driving where Ryan cried over and over, "I just want my Bumble!" and I cried as I drove on - further from Bumble - because I felt so terrible.  Then I decided to stop for lunch (I packed lunches the day before) at a McDonalds with a playplace.  These have been inconsistent for us in the past - some are really designed more for early elementary aged kids than preschoolers - but I took a gamble.  Long story short, both kids got stuck in the very top (at different times) requiring me to climb up twice, the food wasn't yummy, and Ryan flushed the toilet when it was Allie's turn and she had a complete (overtired) meltdown that required me to hold her for a while in the parking lot until she calmed down.  I started to panic a little about losing time and needing to get on the road, and then I thought, "This trip is for them.  If she needs me to hold her until she calms down, I will."  So I did.  The stop ended up being an hour and a half long...but that was ok.  Oh, and did I mention that every time the twins needed to go potty we were in a desolate area with no facilities.  Thank goodness for the travel potties we keep in the van.  We used them 3 times because there was no other option!  The final time stealer?  Construction in Nebraska.  The last 2 hours took much longer because we were slowed down and sometimes stopped.  But we made it!  And the twins thought the trip was a great adventure!  And even the rough second day wasn't actually that rough.  In fact, I didn't feel stressed at all when we got there.  Just relieved to have reached our destination :)

All of the rest of the road trip I had help lined up, so this is the end of the adventures of just us three.  I'm thankful I didn't chicken out.  It was a wonderful time of talking with the kids, experiencing new things with them, hearing what they were excited to see, and teaching them about these things.  They might not remember our great road trip, but I always will - fondly.

April Showers

What else would one do, on the last day of April, but play in the puddles of an April shower?

The twins recently acquired rain gear.  The boots they have had forever (I made a mental note to catch the fall sales last year and got them for a great price, but it meant the twins have been looking at them and begging to wear them ALL winter).  The coats, however, are new.  And the twins have been itching to wear them in real rain. 

 There have been a couple of acceptable rains (i.e. no lightning), but I felt it was still too cold.  Tonight, however, I knew that we were going to go straight inside to a warm shower (and that I had an empty washing machine in which we could throw their wet clothes as we passed by).  So I let them splash - while I stood in the street, under an umbrella, taking pictures.

 Now, the twins are NEVER allowed this close to the street (we have a line in the driveway they are not allowed to cross), so they were hesitant...and hopeful, since the end of the driveway had the big puddles.  I told them this was a special occasion, and that I would allow them that close to get to the big puddles only because I was standing in the street to make sure they would be safe (our street is not busy).  This forbidden treat definitely pushed the experience up a bit on the adventure scale.

 My 2 disappointments are that 1) the hood on Ryan's coat is WAY too small...like infant small, and it makes his coat ride up and doesn't cover his head.  The thing that frustrates me the most about this was that I saw the most adorable Cars rain hats at Wal Mart the other day and thought, "Ryan would love that, but I can't justify buying it when he can just put up the hood on his coat."  Grr....  2) I had my camera on the complete wrong setting.  I couldn't figure out why the pictures were turning out over-exposed, but in all the fun never thought to check all my settings... 

 My disappointments in no way detracted from the fun.

They splashed and ran and jumped and laughed until they were soaked clear through.  And then I announced it was time to head in...after one last jump...

My favorite quote from the evening?

Allie: "The rain tickles me and makes me grow - just like a flower."

Adventures in Art

I mentioned in the previous post that we had another adventure in the afternoon. I started a project with the twins that had been bouncing around in my brain for a while. Actually, since this post almost a year and a half ago! Lucas had let the twins color on the wall because he didn't want to squash their artistic expression, and while I wasn't thrilled that their art was all over my walls, floor, and even a few doors it sort of stuck with me. Suddenly I remembered this hallway/stairway at the school where I went for most of my elementary years. Every year, the seniors (in art class? I'm not sure the qualification) got to collectively paint a mural. Because it was in the high school portion of the school, and therefor a place we rarely traveled, it seemed an exotic and magical place. I remember catching glimpses of seniors painting, looking at every detail, and dreaming about the day when I would get to paint on the wall. Of course, I was at a different school by the time I was a senior, so that never happened. But there has always been a secret desire in me to paint on walls.

So I looked at the walls in the basement, a good portion in the main room being cement (which we would probably never hang any artwork on anyways). And I thought about how a simple coat of paint would make the room neutral once again should we ever want to sell. And I thought about how much my children (and I!) would enjoy painting on the wall. And I started to plan.

The last few months I started to really have a desire to put the plan into motion. To just let them paint. So, I've been on the lookout for inexpensive paint to start our project. A fortuitous trip to Lowe's and a stop at their discount paint provided the perfect start. A quart of paint in a beautiful blue. Even better? It was the special (expensive) No VOC, paint and it was only $3! I bought it, and then I got the twins ready to paint as soon as we were home. They were as excited as I was!

The beginning of our mural. 2 very different styles.

Soon they began to spread out and fill the white space.

Allie decided 1 brush wasn't enough to paint everything she wanted to paint.

Soon after, she decided that she needed to be more "hands on" with her artwork.

Ryan thought that was brilliant and joined in.

And it wasn't long before they were painting more of themselves than the wall...at which point I called it quits!

I love it. I really do. They are so excited about their artwork and showing it off. I love finally having color on the wall. Lucas wants us to add to the "mural" as well. And I found more paint in our furnace room for us to add more colors and layers soon! I, of course, had a talk with them before and after about how we don't paint on any other walls (unless I say...because I have other walls in mind...), and hopefully that sticks. But I feel happy to have provided them with the opportunity to live out my childhood artistic dream :)

Spontaneous Adventures

I broke my glasses the other day. Well, I didn't really break them. They pretty much just randomly fell apart. That's what I get for choosing cheap glasses... The good news is I have vision coverage, and I found a great new eye doctor, and I got new glasses that are uber-durable. They came in the other day, and so Lucas and I planned a morning trip to pick them up. We figured we would make it an adventure and take the kids to McDonalds (to play on their favorite playplace). Then, as we were getting ready to leave we thought it might be a nice day to visit the zoo. So we decided to extend our adventure. Then we thought it might be nice to meet up with someone. So we sent a few texts and our friends ended up being able to meet us there!

L watching the lemurs.

We watched these tigers as tiny cubs on webcam! They were excited to see them in person.

Look, mom! He's sleeping!

The zoo was busy (lots of Earth Day field trips), so we sort of went wherever the crowds were not. We really love this zoo because it is so easy to see all (or most) of it in a morning, and have a relaxing time doing so. They also have recently built and are in the process of adding new exhibits.

A new addition since our last trip - the black rhino!

Their peacocks are always wandering around. I seem to have startled this one while trying to pass it on the sidewalk (I think it might have been my blue coat - he thought I was one of them?). The result was a gorgeous display, but he was clearly ticked. This was made worse by the fact that there were tons of school children nearby who had no clue they should stay away and were petting his outstretched feathers...

He stood in my way on the sidewalk (guarding his territory from me, I assume), and I was blocked by a wall of excited kids and adults on the other, so I got separated from our group. Here is a picture of the twins (watching the peacock from a safe distance) through his feathers as I (unsuccessfully) tried to sneak by.

I finally escaped. The peacock settled down. And we went on our way.

Checking out the ostrich.

Notice how they are holding hands? It was tricky to stay on the ledge, so Allie got up and got steady and then helped Ryan up shouting, "We will work together!" Too bad the otters weren't in the display after all that teamwork...

Watching the resting arctic foxes.

We left the zoo and went to our friend's house (they live about 5 minutes from the zoo) for lunch. It was such a fun morning, and, as we were heading home, Allie dubbed our time "The Morning of 3 Adventures." McDonalds, the Zoo, and a visit to our friend's house. We ended up having another spontaneous adventure after getting home, but that is a story for another time. Hooray for spontaneous adventures and friends that join us for them!

TaeKwon-Do

Out of all of the sports/activities for kids, there are only 2 I feel really adamant about the twins doing. One is piano lessons and the other is TaeKwon-do. I started reading about it a few years before the twins were born - a bit on a whim. I loved the way it focused on more than just physical fitness or even self defense, but also on things like balance, concentration, safety, responsibility, and character. It sounded like an amazing foundation for anything. So, you can imagine how thrilled I was when my friend contacted me to let me know that there was going to be a preschool class offered locally for a bargain price! I immediately signed us up!

Last night they had their first class. It was more of a meet and greet/introduction, but the twins really had so much fun!

Although it was only a short while before she was wanting to jump in, it took a while to get Allie away from the bugs. She was fascinated.

They played several games - duck, duck, goose (my kids' first time ever...it took a little while for them to get the idea), Sah Boo Says (Simon Says), and Frogs and Flies (seen below - while everyone closed their eyes, the instructor would tap someone to be the frog. That person would then stick their tongue out and knock down the "flies" while a "fly catcher" tried to figure out who was the frog).

Eyes closed!

She had been holding her tongue out for several rounds, so it was great when she finally was the frog!

Ryan was such a powerful frog, he knocked himself down!

The twins' favorite thing was when they got to practice kicking!

At the end, the older kids did a demonstration of the things they know at their levels. When we got home, the twins showed me their interpretation of the demonstrations. Adorable. They are so excited, and I am too! It will be even better when they get their uniforms!

Adoption Update

I suppose it is good time for an update on the adoption front.

The great news is that we completed our home study! Yay! It took us so much longer than I anticipated. When we had our first orientation call she said that it takes families 3-6 months to complete the home study. I thought, "Oh, well, we will do it in 2.5 then." Wrong. It took us almost 6 months exactly! But it is finished, and approved, and sent in!

The next step is to submit our application to USCIS. We have everything set. We are just waiting to hear back from our social worker that our form looks correct (to save us time rather than sending in an incorrect form and having them contact us to tell us to refile, etc.), and then we are done! We are hoping to send that in the next day or so. And then we wait. Not forever. At some point before CIS gives us the approval to move forward we get to go and have official fingerprints taken. And I assume we will finish getting together the items for our Dossier so that will be all set once the approval comes. But after the frenzy of appointments, seminars, and paperwork of the home study, I already feel like I'm twiddling my thumbs...

What better to do during this time then work on fundraising! Every time, during the home study, that I would find the process taking longer than I expected (or a week would be lost due to sick kids that required my attention and energy), I would find myself thinking, "It's ok. This is just more time we have to save money." Because, as I've mentioned, it costs a lot. And I sometimes begin to get overwhelmed with the cost. I find myself wondering where the money will come from and worrying about how it will all come together. But then a gentle voice inside my head reminds me that if God calls, He will provide. He has provided so much already. I know He won't just leave us hanging at the very end. It's just hard to remember that when I'm staring at numbers on a sheet of paper...and hoping if I stare long enough they might change to $0 :)

One of the ways God has provided is through many generous people. Through the donations for our yard sales last summer (We will be having more sales this summer...at least 2...partly because we had so many donations I have 2 closets stacked full of bins!). Through gifts - even as little as $5. Through donated airline miles. Every bit has been a blessing. One person that God has recently provided is my friend Marcy. I've known her since college (we lived in the same dorm freshman year). She is a 31 consultant, and when she saw on facebook that we were adopting, she immediately messaged me and said she wanted to do a fundraiser for us. In the midst of home study madness, I asked that she wait until we were finished so I could focus better and suggested April. April 1st she contacted me to get things set up! Now, if you don't know how a 31 fundraiser works, it goes like this: the 31 consultant donates their commission to the cause. This wonderful friend is going to all this work to put this together and travel to my house (she lives in northern Ohio) just to donate whatever profit she would receive to help us adopt. I really feel blessed to know such wonderful people.

Of course, for her to have anything to donate, people have to actually buy 31 products, and here is where the plug comes in (I know, I hear the groan. I feel badly that it always seems like I'm plugging a fundraiser. So if you will feel pressured to buy in any way, just stop reading! Then you won't have the info and you don't have to feel pressured!). This Saturday (the 21st) we are having an Open House at my house from 5-9. If you are around (which, lets face it, if you are one of the friends or family members who read the blog, you do so because you live far away!) stop by! If you can't make it or live far away (which is more likely), you can shop online and have it go to the cause. Just click THIS LINK and it will take you Marcy's 31 website. Then go to "My Events" (its the second thing listed under her profile picture and contact info). You will see several events, one being "Miller Adoption Fundraiser Open House." Click on the "Shop Now" button and your order will be included! The fundraiser closes April 23rd...so there is a little less than a week to get the order in. And, if you aren't big on 31 products, or don't have the money to spend right now (which I understand), but have a friend or two who love 31 products, maybe direct them to Marcy's website and our event?

And in case you are wondering, the big milestone in our adoption adventure will be receiving our approval from USCIS to most forward! I will definitely keep you posted and let you know when that exciting event happens :)